“Sometimes I wish I could just have a fire to get rid of all my stuff and start fresh.”
I see this kind of statement now and then in social media groups about minimalism or simple living. I know they’re not really serious, just frustrated by the long and difficult process of decluttering. There is something quite appealing about starting over from nothing, at least in theory. But I’m here to tell you that in reality, it’s no fun. I should know. I went through a house fire. The experience was frightening and stressful and exhausting and no fun at all.
I was fortunate. No persons or pets died. The structure of the house was intact though the inside needed to be gutted down to the wooden frames of each wall before rebuilding could begin. The kitchen was completely destroyed, but most of the house had “only” heat and smoke damage, which made the household inventory easier.
The fact that I had planned to put the house on the market in a few days seemed like even worse timing. It was distressing at the time but actually turned out to be a blessing in disguise. I had already packed up the majority of my books, photos, personal knickknacks, and more to make the house more presentable. Those boxes were stored in the garage and were affected very little by the fire or smoke. I also had good insurance and great restoration contractors to help me through the process. Looking back, there were some important lessons gained from this difficult and stressful experience.
1- I learned a lot about myself and those around me. People revealed their true character and relationship to me. Some so-called friends never showed up in those five months of rebuilding. Thankfully, I had some friends and colleagues who did step up and help. This wasn’t just some minor glitch in my life that people in my world could ignore. I had been burned out of my home. My son had been taken to the ER, airlifted to a military hospital for tests, and spent a couple of days in the burn unit and incubation ward. Luckily, he suffered only minor smoke inhalation and a few superficial burns. But I’ve never forgotten those who could but would not offer their support.
2- I learned more than ever that possessions are unimportant. It’s all just stuff. You can buy stuff again. My son returned to health and our two dogs were fine. My daughter returned from her out-of-state college to enjoy her summer in our temporary rental home. Our real home had not been very cluttered by most people’s standards, but when I started to document all the stuff for insurance, I learned that I had a lot more than I realized. Just think about what you have in your closets, cabinets, and cupboards! I also learned that used furniture and the rest of my house’s contents aren’t worth very much money; they lose value fast. Lesson learned—don’t overspend on furnishing a house!
3- I learned that I was resilient. Sure, I was stressed, sometimes to the breaking point, but I carried on. I’m single and had to make all the decisions myself. There were hundreds of decisions to make, from settling into a temporary rental home to rebuilding and refurnishing my house. Through it all I was working full time and maintaining a household with two college-aged kids, who were home for the summer, and two dogs. I had to use up every vacation hour I had left to take care of all the details of the fire and rebuild, but I managed to get through it.
4- I learned that I need very little to feel content. I had few clothes or personal possessions during the early months of the rebuild. I was in a rental house that I didn’t like much and my dogs kept escaping the poorly fenced yard. But none of that really mattered. The kids and dogs were ok. I soon purchased some tea supplies and books to keep me happy. Slowly but surely, I began to acquire what I’d need to move back into my house, but I only replaced about half of my stuff. I knew that I still wanted to sell the large suburban house and buy smaller, so I accepted the loss of replacement value (insurance paid what an item was worth used and only reimbursed replacement value if I purchased the item). It just wasn’t worth it to me to go out and buy all that stuff again.
I wouldn’t wish a house fire on anyone. The anxiety about my son’s condition and the stress of dealing with insurance paperwork and rebuilding the house added more than a few gray hairs. Some things don’t go away—the initial panic of hearing sirens and the anxiety of fire warnings on the news. Nevertheless, I was able to find some silver linings in the end. It helped keep my focus on what’s truly important in life. Hint—it’s not the stuff!
Suggestions
Take a photo or video inventory of your home at least once a quarter. That includes opening cupboards, dressers, and closets. Then email the photos or videos to yourself. In case of catastrophe, you will want to claim everything you lose. Do not rely on your memory!
Scan your rental or homeowners’ insurance documents. If you own a home, do the same with your mortgage information. Email it to yourself.
RESOURCES
Take a look at my blog about the year of my house fire:
After the Fire: Rebuilding House and Life after a Fire
For more resources, go to this page: Resources
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